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Writer's pictureJ Philip Faranda

Do All Real Estate Agents Have ADHD or is it Just Me?

If I had a dime for every salesperson I ever met who is great at closing deals but disorganized and awful at paperwork I'd have quite a few dimes. I personally qualify for this description. My car has typically been messy, my desk drawers were horror shows, and my attention span was superhuman for things that interested me and nonexistent for things that bored me, like paperwork.


I've managed hundreds of agents who fit that profile.


I empathize with a car that looks like it is lived in, a messy desk, and a voicemailbox that's full. And I while I am not a mental health professional who can diagnose ADHD, I am have diagnosis myself and I have some pretty good hunches.


I could write a book about my ADHD journey, but I'll stick with its impact on my real estate practice.


Well, mostly real estate. Growing up in the 70s, attending Catholic schools, and having WW2 -era parents was a perfect storm of a bad mix for kid with ADHD. I was raised on scoldings for being lazy, lacking self control, and acting impulsively. Participating in sports helped, but the hyperfocus that comes with the condition was only weaponized to illustrate that I could be good if I'd only control myself.


When I was about 30, I read the book You Mean I'm Not Lazy, Stupid or Crazy?! and it hit me like a ton of bricks. I called my mother, who was an RN, and asked her if she thought I had ADHD. The words had barely left my lips when she said "absolutely."

The obvious next question was why nothing was done to help me. She explained that in the 70s there wasn't much they could do. She was a nurse, Ioved her, and I have to believe that she was truthful.


But knowing I probably had ADHD didn't remove the challenges, and as I got older and maturity set in, I did curtail the impulsive outbursts. I finally got a diagnosis and treatment when I was 53.


It was bittersweet. On the happy side, the medication worked well for me, and my quality of life improved. I was more productive, better focused, and grateful. On the less happy side, I wished I had sought treatment decades earlier.


There is a cost to untreated ADHD for many of us, and you don't appreciate it until you experience life on the other side of being diagnosed and medical intervention. I can say with a high degree of certainty that if I got treatment when I was 40 or even 30 that I'd be further ahead in life and my career. However, amor fati. Regretting reality beyond your control is the blueprint for unhappiness. I'd rather be happy.


So, I focus on the joys of being more productive, better focused, and more in control of myself when I am under stress or experiencing fatigue. All of those things make me more money and elevate my quality of life. I am grateful I did something, and every day is an opportunity to explore the world as the Me I want to be. I don't feel any different. I actually feel more the same.


Medication is not a cure. Old habits take a while to die. But I strongly encourage anyone who thinks they may have ADHD to go to the doctor and explore their options.




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